People always associate failures with negative and bad experiences. For the purpose of sensitivity to others, in this blog I will call failures “erasable mistakes.” While I refer to failures as erasable mistakes, I also know that there are some mistakes that cannot be erased, but you can crawl, walk, jump or fly over them. I prefer to fly over my erasable mistakes. Flying simply means quickly getting over them without a scratch. What will be an example of an erasable mistake? Anything that you think you started late in life, education, marriage, business or career? The good news is, you started, adjusted, and changed course as your deep desires and passion pulled you to the right direction. As long as you are still breathing, that is the only criteria needed for evolution or expansion. Not even age can limit growth.
Although, age is not just a number. In this scenario, let’s consider age as just a number because we need to erase some mistakes. On the other hand, examples of erasable mistakes are all the opportunities that were lost along the way. Some Christians’ believe that whatever God has for you, is yours and it cannot be missed. While that is true on some level, there are stories in the Bible that proved otherwise. God can replace you with another or stones if the need be. Daniel’s prayers were delayed, unbelief kept people from receiving their blessings on time, in the case of Abraham, waiting on the Lord was compromised and that interrupted God’s divine plans. I did not want to quote many scriptures and bore you, but these are all true stories. We can miss opportunities if we are not ready when they show up or come our way.
I purposefully want to succeed in everything I do, and try not to miss too many opportunities, but the unpremeditated side effects of that drive for success, is sometimes inexplicable failures. Some of my erasable mistakes ranges from dysfunctional family ties, to marital or abusive wounds, to travelling scars, to delayed career moves, and even the loss of great friendships. To flop at some things might just be a learning curve or knowing what doesn’t work and changing course. In my generation, most parents will always tell their children they were the best in their class and make success appear natural, while they themselves were struggling with their average lives. Today, my daughters know that I was not always the smartest child growing up, still working at being smart, but I studied and prayed my way to success.
As a child I always wondered, “If someone was so good at something, or the best in their class, why does it not translate to instant success in real life or life after school?” Sincerely, most people who were just average in school experience great success faster every now and then. You see, there is more to learning than just being good, smart or the best. (If you are naturally a smart person and have experienced great success, overlook this section, but if you think like me and have experienced unexplained failures, read on) Nobody plans to be unsuccessful in life, but everyone sets out to succeed and probably tries to make a big splash on life’s stage. As a lifelong student, sometimes I think I have gotten some things down to science, meaning I do not feel the need to study a particular subject over and over again in order to pass or win in life. That assumption was disproved in all of my previous universities. Now, I understand why Thomas Edison took more than a thousand times to have a bright “light bulb”. For some of us, to erase mistakes, we have to do things over and over again until our light bulb moment appears. There should also be the need to change course while we shut down or quit what does not work. There is a popular saying “If you do the same thing over and over again and expecting a different result, you’re insane.” I say if you do the same failed things over and over again, and receive an encouraging report (or a little light bulb moment) that only you can understand or interpret, I will say keep at it until you leap forward. After all, life is mostly routines.
Freedom Thoughts
To understand erasable mistakes, we have to define success. Let’s all agree that society has also define success and failures for us. The more money you have, the more successful you are. “The Forbes List”, more degrees, more properties, more power, more spiritual, more religion, more pride, more ego, more companies, more followers, more friends, more trophies, more popularity, etc. You get the idea. In fact, more of everything is considered successful except more spouses. Even more wives in some part of our culture are a sign of wealth and success. As a society, we do not want to encourage more failures, but we should remove the stigma of failures from the closet by talking more about how we failed before we succeeded.
Failure is an education arc but our society shines more light or amplifies success without sharing the many failure stories before success. Have you ever wondered why you kept trying something over and over again, but did not work? And other people will try that same thing and boom, instant success? The idea of a merit based society does still exist probably in vacuity. Sometimes we cannot deny that access to an influential source can make a big difference between success and failure. Occasionally, someone has to guide your way to success or simply shine some light on your hard work. When breakthroughs don’t come as effortless as everyone makes it seem, you start questioning your abilities and disabilities. Disabilities in this context are not primarily physical. It can be procrastination, lack of motivation, inadequate finances, depression, dysfunctional anxiety, “it’s too hard mentality”, wrong location, and every kind of demoralizing excuses that can keep you from succeeding, is what I call disabilities. Is there anything such as luck? What about the “it factor”? What about chance or fate? Did you really work hard to succeed or did you just get lucky? Did you study everything you can that created your success? Romans 9:16 and Galatians 6:9. People often talk about the “It factor.” I call it the “favor factor” or the “God favor.” It does exist sometimes in my opinion, when it comes to success. How should we tap into it? Prayers (asking), researching (seeking), and looking (watching) out for opportunities. Matthew 7:7
The failure learning curves, the avoidable errors and the erased mistakes should be taught as openly as our successes. The secret to success should no longer be a secret but an open path. I know a few people have written books on their secrets to success, but society still abhors the fact that you should keep your secret to yourselves, and even your failures should be in the closet. In fact, we are all guilty of hiding our failures and magnifying our successes without detailed explanations on that journey to success. But, the monopoly of knowledge or lack of knowledge can destroy a nation. Hosea 4:6
Reflections
- You are not a failure because you failed at anything, but because you did not have the courage to erase your mistakes
- You can have courage, but without proper tools, failure is still inevitable
- Study your way to success (You can also pray) Proverbs 3 & 4
- Open up your failures to embrace your success
- Share your steps of failure before you succeeded because this may help someone climb up the success ladder
- We should all teach as long as we can speak
- I contemplate that every one of us has untapped potential which can also be titled “enclosed greatness”
- Learn the skills to fly over your failures and move quickly from them
- What is done is done. If your mistakes cannot be erased, bury that dream, close your eyes, and dream a completely new dream
- Fear of failure should never be in your consideration list to success
- Failures are like big and small bumps to your great success, fight them if you can, avoid them at all cost, learn from them if need be, erase them as quickly as possible and allow them if they are inevitable Proverbs 24:16
- Always look out for the “God factor” “Favor factor” “Grace factor” or “It factor.” These factors can make hard work look easy
